Home is where the heart is. But it’s also the first place where children are socialized into gender norms, values and stereotypes.

From the moment babies are born, their assigned sex (male or female) immediately begins to shape how they are treated and what opportunities they receive, based on stereotypes of men and women in their society. Their social behaviour and conduct also shift depending on whether the child is a girl or a boy.

In fact, studies have shown that an individual’s sense of being either male or female is predominately determined by the way they are treated by others. Based on their external environment, children learn very quickly (from as young as nine months old in some cases) that boys and girls are different – they have their own colours, toys, abilities and particular interests.

These differences and assigned roles based on gender become unquestioned rationale for many ideas about what boys, girls, men and women can and cannot do. For example, many societies expect females to behave in a submissive, dependent and emotional way, while males are expected to be strong, independent and stoic.

 

 

The most damaging impact of these expectations about how boys and girls should behave is that they hurt everyone. – When people are expected to conform to restrictive ideas about how boys and girls should act, it limits what they can do – especially if it doesn’t match what is considered acceptable for their sex at birth.

Preconceived notions about roles and responsibilities also result in girls and women experiencing violence and harassment and struggling to receive equal pay and opportunities, while boys and men experience higher rates of substance abuse and completed suicide. In addition, body-image issues are prevalent among both sexes, with a large percentage of both men and women agreeing that they’re self-conscious about their physical form.

But these widespread ideas about what it means to be a woman, girl, man or boy can be tackled at home. We work with parents and caregivers to help identify and counter societal expectations for girls and boys.

Parents teach children their place in the world

Without a doubt, the most significant influence on gender role development occurs within the family setting, with parents modelling and passing on to their children their own beliefs about gender.

In many patriarchal societies, there is an idea that boys are preferable to girls. According to research conducted in North America, families are more likely to continue having more children if they only have daughters versus if they only have sons – indicating that there is a preference to have male children in the family.

And in low-income countries, where millions live below the poverty line, parents with limited financial resources tend to favour having boys, for a myriad of reasons:

• Boys are perceived as being more “valuable” and worthy of investing in. For example, a preference for sending boys to school is fuelled by a belief that all girls will eventually get married. Therefore, investing in a girl’s education reaps little return, since a girl who stays home and learns how to take care of a family is of greater value to a future husband.
• In marriage, a girl often joins her husband’s family and may cost her family a dowry (property or money brought by a bride to her husband on their marriage).
• In many countries, girls and women do not have property rights. Only men are allowed to own or inherit property, so having a son keeps assets in the family and makes sure parents will have somewhere to live when they are older.
• If a family needs physical labour to run a farm or make a living in another way, boys are seen as more capable and stronger than girls.

As part of Plan’s maternal, newborn, and child health-care programming, we work with fathers to take an active role in supporting women during pregnancy and childbirth and in the care of newborns.

Treating boys and girls differently

Beliefs about the value of boys versus girls are commonly reflected in the way parents treat their children.

For example, the gendered division of household work is accepted almost everywhere. Boys are more likely than girls to have maintenance chores such as mowing the lawn or painting, while girls are given domestic chores like cooking and cleaning. This segregation of household labour tells children that their work will differ depending on whether they are a girl or a boy.

While both parents influence children’s perceptions of gender, fathers in particular are more likely to reinforce common stereotypes, by encouraging gendered toys, sports and rough play with their sons versus their daughters. In addition, the way fathers treat their wives can have a long-term impact on their sons’ and daughters’ personalities and life choices.

In fact, fathers who take on an active role in child care and domestic labour positively influence their children by showing that the adult male role can be nurturing. This positive role modelling helps boys become more supportive husbands, fathers, brothers and friends to girls and women. At the same time, it positively impacts the self-esteem of young girls and reinforces that all people should be treated equally.

Additionally, mothers who work outside the home and take on a financial-provider role in the family also help break down stereotypes for their children – especially their daughters – and challenge ideas about conventional female roles.

Equality for all

Of course, parents aren’t the only ones responsible for how their children perceive their role in society. Much of the world outside the home – including peers, teachers, caretakers and the media – has an impact on how children (and even parents themselves) think girls or boys should behave.

However, parents who are conscious of differing expectations of girls and boys within their society have an important opportunity to challenge this divide, break stereotypes and educate their children.

When everyone plays a part in standing up for equality between girls and boys, we can create a just and equal world where no one is held back.

Transforming harmful attitudes toward girls

This society-made divide continues to grant men and boys more rights, privileges and opportunities to become key decision makers and influencers, while girls and women are denied opportunities to develop themselves and improve their social condition, simply because they are female.

In many low-income countries, girls and women are not free to exercise basic human rights such as education, health care and protection from violence. This further perpetuates serious global issues like intergenerational cycles of poverty, early and forced marriage, physical and emotional violence and high maternal and newborn mortality rates.

At Plan International, we’re committed to transforming these unequal power relations by addressing the root causes of inequality and promoting the inherent power and value of women and girls. Our programming goes beyond improving the condition of women and girls – we seek to improve their social position within their communities.

Learn more about our programming here..